Wednesday, October 21, 2009
The sun shone on Monday and we were blessed a mild day.
It was a good day to be my last day on earth.
Those thoughts creep into your head, don't they?
But they floated out as quickly as they floated in, which was a very good thing.
I had an unusual amount of peace and I attribute that to prayers and faith and the Holy Spirit.
I can be a real Nervous Nelly but I wasn't yesterday.
I felt calm and even when those morbid thoughts of 'this could be goodbye' came to me.
I let them go.
Patrick and Emma were with me the whole way and they were both so wonderful.
I was not alone and I think that made a enormous difference.
In fact, I think I have just learned something about caring for others.
Even if you don't think you are needed and even if you don't have something to talk about and even if it is awkward,
I have learned, just now, that being there is a really great thing.
I have had surgery before and I was very afraid and sick and alone.
I remember the alone. It was awful and scary.
I don't know why THAT experience didn't teach me?
Maybe I had to experience the comfort of being surrounded by those who love you to realize it's effect.
I do not want to forget it.
I was not much of a comfort at all for my mother-in-law when she was sick.
I drove her to all of her appointments but I didn't sit with her and visit her as much as I should have.
That makes me really sad.
I will do better in the future.
Life is filled with lessons that you have to learn in your own time.
Never again will I underestimate the power of being there.
Again, thank you for lifting me up in prayer.
I felt it. I felt so calm and I know that came from Above.
p.s. I am feeling great!