When we arrived home from Chicago Patrick informed me that the bath tub was not draining well at all.
He had tried Drano and even tried to poke things down the drain to make it flow.
On Wednesday evening he said, "Call the Man." (name that show)
So yesterday morning I called the man.
A young, tall, plumber stopped by to check it out.
The young tall plumber has been here before.
He is very quiet. Too quiet.
He is the kind of quiet that says...don't talk to me.
So I didn't.
He went straight upstairs to see about the bath tub.
I heard him turning water on and off.
I heard a loud drill sound.
For 45 minutes.
The drill.
The water.
The drill.
The water.
I heard him go outside four times.
I heard him come back in.
For what I don't know.
But the drilling commenced.
And finally the water ran....and ran and ran.
I could hear it slosh down the drain in the wall.
Then the quiet plumber came down the stairs, went outside and came back in to mumble goodbye.
I said, lamely, "That took a long time."
He said, "Extraordinary hairball." Turned and left.
"Extraordinary hairball."
I find that both gross and hilarious.
XOXO
Donna Elsie
p.s. no picture
HI-LARIOUS!!! I am sitting alone in my flat, laughing so loud I feel a little silly. TOO funny.
ReplyDeleteI can so relate, because in days of old when my two long-haired gals and us were still under the same roof, OH MY LANTA the hairballs. Sheesh.
Thankfully we never had to resort to drills.
:-)
I was just about to leave for the evening and decided to take a peek here. thanks for the laugh!
I am reading this aloud at bible study in 10 minutes. :) hys.ter.i.cal.
ReplyDeleteI love that! Cracking me up!
ReplyDeleteThat IS gross and awesome!!
ReplyDeleteHa Ha! I love it! I can hear him say that very straight faced and quietly. That has made me laugh! Thank you!!!
ReplyDeleteI guess there really *is* a downside to everything - even having thick, luxurious, gorgeous hair! Hairballs make me gag. :-)
ReplyDelete"Aunt Bee, CALL the man!"
ReplyDeleteYup!! You got it :)
DeleteI came back to take a peek here again, in hopes that somebody gave the source - I was about to Google it and I gotta run. YAY Aunt Bea!!! LOVE her. Love that show.
DeleteDonna,
ReplyDeleteSnorting with laughter here. Let's hear it for favorite one liners of all time....extraordinary hairball. HILARIOUS.
Bet you're glad that Katie cut her hair (-:
You could write for TV, Donna. And do it really well. Such a funny post.
Di
What an amazing compliment. Thank you!
DeleteSo, who would you cast as the tall, thin plumber? I would say John Cleese, but he is SO not quiet.
DeleteDi
Joe Manganiello.
DeleteIt's so true! I've read the story three times, admiring the economy, both in the plumber and in the telling of the story. Bravo!
Delete{{{LIKE}}}
DeleteThis is one of the funniest things EVER. And I completely agree with Di. You are a very talented writer. In this one case, we are glad the tale is not accompanied by a photo. :))))
ReplyDeleteMary Z
Laughing way out loud. So funny---just think how much bigger it would have been had Katie not had her haircut !! I needed the laugh. Have a good rest of the day !!
ReplyDeleteI like to quote things that are completely nonsense at random...I see "Extraordinary Hairball" being a new favorite!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laugh!
I'm with you, Anonymous!
DeleteEvery time a hard problem is resolved: Extraordinary Hairball.
You. are. the. best.
ReplyDeleteI have slow drains (due to hair) and just saw some posts online about using a Zip-it tool regularly to pull out the clogs. Apparently it's a few bucks at the hardware store and says it's a single-use item, but lots of folks carefully clean it and use it again. There are videos on YouTube of people using it and pulling out rather extraordinary hairballs!
ReplyDeleteThis little tool is amazing. It is also so gross to see the hair come out of the drain!
DeleteIt makes me gag to think about it. This is a job for quiet plumber.
DeleteNot something I want to see, BeeBelle! jamie
ReplyDeleteHaving lots of hair myself, I know the pains of a clogged drain, but I have to say, the fact he had to use a DRILL to get it out made me laugh way to hard.
ReplyDeleteI am reading this at work and now my coworkers think I am nuts for randomly laughing at my computer screen, but it was worth it for the "extaordinary hairball" comment. I do believe I am going to work that phrase into a conversation today.
I was hoping I could be the first to identify Andy & Aunt Bea - oh well! I love that episode and your version/writing was so funny! I'm wondering, does the quiet plumber talk with Patrick? Service men only talking to other men drives me NUTS!
ReplyDeleteLaughing along with you! Great story!!
ReplyDeleteSarah P. from Iowa
Absolutely HILARIOUS! Made my day. Laughter is so good for the soul.
ReplyDeleteDebbie Z.
So funny! As a mother of SIX daughters I am totally sympathetic. I used to be grossed out by the combination of hair, soap & scum that occasionally (pretty regularly, actually!) blocks my drain, but after a while I got used to it!
ReplyDeleteFirst I laughed and then I thought of the play…Hair…"Darlin' Give me a head with hair, long beautiful hair" and somewhere in the song I think it says something about getting it "caught in trees," but no where does it say anything about getting it stuck in pipes and becoming an "extraordinary hairball." Yes, I agree..great writing and imagery without a photo this time.
ReplyDeletelove and prayers, jep
Dear Donna and jep-Axelle has a nice post for the season......Regards-Jamie
DeleteYou had me at "call the man!"
ReplyDeleteAt least it wasn't the "worst hairball I've ever seen."
ReplyDeletemy dad was a plumber, one with a sense of humor. He would have told a couple of silly jokes about hair balls as you wrote him a cheque ;)
ReplyDeleteHa! And thanks for the "no picture." ;)
ReplyDeleteNow that made Fireman laugh!!!!
ReplyDeleteHilarious in every way.
ReplyDeleteSometimes people we think don't want us to talk to them, want it the most.
A long time ago I worked with this family. Every time I would go to their house the grandfather would sit and glare at me. He glared so much and so hard, I was afraid to say hi. I smiled and he glared. For weeks this went on. Finally, I said, "Sir, your stare hurts my heart. Could we be cordial to one another?" And guess what? He started laughing. And he said he was just waiting for me to say hi. I never forgot him. He became a great source of encouragement to me in those beginning social work years. He passed away 2 years ago and his family called me to come to the funeral. I am so thankful I squashed my fear and made a friend.
Oh, Miz Boo, this story is priceless!
ReplyDeleteI am going to catch up on your blog. I have been out of the blog loop for months now because I was trying to be a good girl, go to bed early, and get my daughters' schoolwork done. I have missed you though.
Christina
HI Christina! Welcome back. I've missed you.
DeleteThat is so funny! I bought a little plastic strip with prongs on it at the hardware store. I use it to clean out my own hairballs, which I find to be a totally gross task. But I would rather do that every so often than call a plumber - I have long hair. It would get expensive!
ReplyDeleteI am all too familiar with those 'extraordinary hairballs'...mother of four with crazy long hair. You soooo wish you had my plumber, he's a happy and handsome little fella. ;)
ReplyDeleteThat made me literally LAUGH OUT LOUD :)
ReplyDeletexoxo melzie
I'm a gagger. This story made me gag. Can't write about that extraordinary thing. Good job.
ReplyDelete